Are you easily agitated by the actions of others or situations in life ? Learning to face life situations as they come requires a calm mind in order to handle them effectively. A calm mind will be able to see more clearly, be less judgemental, and be more ready to understand each situation deeply.
I used to get easily irritated by the behaviors and actions of others, and those negative feelings would then linger on for a while. My disturbed mind would drain me of my energy and my entire day would be wasted, sometimes days.
This year, since I started writing my blog as a point for my reflection, I am retraining myself to treat all situations of life as opportunities for me to see things deeper, so that I do not react negatively.
A Heart To Learn – A Mind To Calm
I believe everyone wants to be peaceful and happy, just like the goal I have set out for myself. As each person’s outlook in life and behaviours would differ, even amongst members of the same family, it would be very hard to experience inner peace if one is easily irritated by others’ ever-changing behaviors and actions.
If our mind is not calm, we may perform actions from our agitated mind which we may regret later on. Sharing some of my learning points which I found useful towards my practice for a calmer mind and I hope you would find them helpful too :
- accept that every human being is different and learn to be kind and loving towards them. When I can do that, I find I am more able to stay calm and more willing to listen deeper, and more eager to face the situation to solve problems.
- If our mind has too many needless wants and desires, and not all can be fulfilled, it will cause us to be very frustrated and we might suffer from mental destress. I found one of the best ways to manage this mental destress is to cut down my needless wants and desires.
- practise quiet sitting, taking a stroll in the park to tap nature energy, and simple meditation. I found these activities to be very useful to help clear the mind.
As I keep practising these points and learn with my heart to be simple, be clear-minded, be kind and understanding when dealing with others, I find my mind is calmer and less reactive.
Be Kind To Yourself
Life is not perfect and I do still have my down days…This week, I found myself struggling with so many distractions that I fell back into my reactive mood. Not a good feeling at all, but I am happy that I am now more able to get out of the negativity faster.
There will be challenges in any life learning journey. Do not be overly negative and critical of yourself as it can turn frustration into anger and sadness into despair.
Practise self-care is the basic foundation for a sustainable personal growth. Treat yourself like you would treat a good friend or a loved one where you would provide comfort and care when they make mistakes. It is in our human nature at times to make mistakes as we journey though life, so be gentle and kind to yourself.
May all be well and happy always 🙏.
Lyn 🌻😊
So true 🙂
And i continue to be a work in progress on that front
Hi Geri, me too… we always will be work in progress as learning never stops 🙂
Lyn,
Beautifully expressed. Loving kindness with wisdom will take a long time to achieve. If one cant love and respect oneself, I think it is hard for oneself to part with pure white Love to others. I recalled a saying ‘In the world, bad is not too bad; Good is not too good’. It took me a long time to understand. It is kind of similar to when I argued white and black are not colours of the rainbow spectrum. I think I am writing out of line but, does it matter if my thoughts are going in all directions. Now, I will pull back, stay focus and ends ‘Lyn, keep learning and, I am learning from your truthful, loving blogs’. Thank you for sharing . Springxx
Thank you Spring for sharing your interesting thoughts.. always grateful for the added perspective.
It’s very good that we can exchange views with our life long learning experience…
Absolutely.
So much we don’t know yet and so much more to learn.
That’s what I’m doing waking up everyday.
Selfcare is so important yet not easy to come to term and even appreciate.
Great reminder Lyn!
Great thought Dennis ! Waking up everyday learning and discovering new things 🙂
Yes self care…I know of many people who are harder on themselves than they need to be ..
Very good article about self love and self care !
Thanks Mich ❤️
I have been secretly stealing many ideas from your blog. Well expressed article Lyn !! I especially love your last paragraph. It is really so important to practise self-care. If we do not take care of ourselves, no one will. Only when we are happy and well, will we be able to take care of others!
Hi SKL, you are too kind ❤️.. so happy you find my blog ideas relevant !
I am grateful for your consistent sharing of thoughts here, I am sure my other readers has benefited from them too !
Staying calm is such a tall task. Its a continuous journey that requires practice. You are so right about being kind to oneself, we tend to want to solve everything, thus generating frustrations.
Thank you for sharing. Happy mid autumn in advance!
Love your thoughts Viv, totally agreed ! Thank you for your sharing and happy mid-autumn day 🙂
Watch 9.11 on netflix… One will truly treasure our lives more…
Indeed, solemn day to remind us to live our life well… thanks for sharing Yam.
Hi Shalyn, enjoy reading your blog and taking in your counsel. Not often we get to see ‘the other side’ of our colleagues after working together many years. You give me much to think about – as usual ;).
Yeah oftentimes we get too caught up with our busy corporate life that we overlooked so many other important things in life. So grateful to be able to share my learnings and very happy that you find it meaningful ..Thanks so much Trav, I appreciate your sharing 🙂
Really really good reminder . Thank you so much for all your sharing which are truly impactful to me, Lyn !
Grateful to be able to share and very happy you find it impactful. Thank you BT, I appreciate you sharing your thoughts !
Dear Lyn
Thank you for yet another great reminder. Personally, I feel that age & experience have kind of mellow me down when faced with situations that were not ideal or according to my wish. We cannot change the situation that has already taken place but we can choose our responses that will greatly lead to desirable or undesirable outcomes. I consciously practice not to react immediately to ‘irritating’ emails, messages, behaviors or conversations. Having a ‘cooling’ period by taking a break, looking at the beautiful sky or speaking to a good friend helps to calm me down and allows me to view things from a different perspective and thus leads to a more appropriate response. Indeed cultivating a clear & calm mind is one of the many forms of self-care and self-love. Take great care and continue the good practice.
Cheers,
Judy
Dear Judy, thank you for sharing your personal experience and very wise practices. So much we can learn with these exchange of views, love it !
Lyn,
thank you for sharing. Always believe in the more you share, the more you learn. I personally can really relate myself in real situation you described in this article.
To stay calm, is to do nothing first, not to respond immediaty to the situation first. But rather take a step back to see the whole picture clearly or even assess the picture from different angle. Cool yourself down.
Great thoughts and practices AY, thank you so much for sharing 🙂