The simplest form of love and kindness to any human being is never to judge but to accept everyone for who they are.
The ability to practise this to the fullest extent will empower us to be a much happier person. Our happiness is no longer influenced by another’s behavior and nor is it dependent on someone whom we have no control over. You accept them for who they are, no judgement; no expectations and no conflicts and hence a kinder world. This is the beauty!
What Inspires Change
I am extremely inspired by a special friend, who no matters what happens, is always very calm and would exhibit kindness and courage to squarely face the reality of life…What she said years ago has been stuck with me :
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”You are responsible for your own peace and happiness and the only way to attain them is to accept everyone for who they are and influence their change positively through your love and kindness. It is impossible to force a change on anyone who is not willing”
But how many of us can truly practise this to perfection? My current reality is still far from it! I still have occasions of lapses where I was judgemental, either consciously or unconsciously.
Example, a simple comment or a subtle question like “why is she so stubborn” or “why is she so selfish” can already spin many other potential conflicts and pain. The danger of being judgemental on someone is that once it sets in, it is so hard to change that perception. Everything that one does henceforth, right or wrong, would often end up as a source of conflict. You would feel so strongly that the only solution was for them to change..
So can you really accept a stubborn or a selfish person for who she is or would you try to change her ? I had obviously tried to change one but have failed miserably, instead it caused me more pain.
Start With The Right Intention
You want to change for yourself and for your own happiness. The power of thoughts… how else to start but with the right mindset. I started practising this positive affirmation mantra daily “I am love, I am peace, I am happy and I will accept everyone for who they are”.
So instead of asking “why is she so stubborn”, change it to “I accept her for who she is”.
Amazingly after practising this daily consistently for just two weeks, I sense some progress. I felt like there were days when I was about to get disappointed or upset with someone.. my subconscious mind would remind me to accept them for who they are and this immediately calms me down before I end up saying anything that could hurt.
It may take me beyond this lifetime to fully accept everyone for who they are, but for now, I am just simply grateful for the progress I am making every single day and this makes me happy !
Lyn 🌻😊
Interesting subject. You have nicely captured this topic…“acceptance” with your personal experience. Thanks for sharing. It is not easy to follow during young age. But the level of …“acceptance who they are” will increase when we see every small good things from the other person.
Indeed bp, it comes with our life experiences and slow acceptance as we learn more. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Good morning, lyn. You did it again with a good article.
I would practice it very hard to accept who they are!! Thanks for the reminder, and hard to change a person and accept who they are . I have to practice; we are in control of our destiny.
Love SL 12
Thanks Sheena. Trust you will discover your own beauty as you start accepting others for who they are.
Thank you so much Lyn for sharing your thoughts. This comes in very handy as to accepting of who the person is and be not judgemental. This is a very good reflection for me.
You are most welcome Ngee Key. I am so glad you find this relevant and useful. May you experience your own beauty
Lyn,
My husband tells me to write from my heart as I always do. My following comments may be out of context.
Last 3 days, we enjoyed so much peace from 3 tradesmen who were replacing windows in our home. They walked in, settled down their tools and went straight to work for 6 to 7 hours. They focused on their job only and not distracted by any objects in our home. They were very mindful, worked without radio or looking into any mobile phone, chatted softly to each other relating managing the weight of the windows, levelling them, filling up the gaps and all problems resolved without consulting us. Their peaceful, calm manner of working and respecting our home had given us the precious kindness which we doubt they knew. We received no comment nor criticism on anything within our house. When I asked if they would like to have coffee or tea , their replies were similar -anything which was convenience for us.They lifted my mood and I made them Spring Rolls for lunch and the next day a second round of spring rolls to take away for their families. We parted with thank you to each others, when we said good bye to them, we were sorry to see them go. A brief encounter in life’s journey , sweet and memorable, respects were mutual, the the job well done, they left us with thoughts that we were so blessed. Springxx
That’s great Spring ! Great example how being surrounded by people with positive vibes can bring us so much calm and joy. Thanks for sharing, much appreciated!
Lyn, great sharing about your experiences. No one likes to be judged. We have to recognize that this is who the person is. I have learnt it is important to accept and respect each other’s differences and influence their change positively through love and kindness. Well said Lyn, try to see the positive side of others so we can have our own peace, happiness and also build good relationship. True, when we get to accept, there is no frustration, anger or resentment. We will have more good days than bad days.
Yes, acceptance and influencing change with kindness instead of expectations will give us more good days than bad days ! I keep reminding myself everyday. Thank you so much for sharing your experience Eliza.