Good Heart Matters #1
A good heart… What does it really mean and how do I know if my good heart is shining or fading ?
I recently caught up with an old friend whom I had not been in touch with for a few years and just learnt she is now a CEO of a hospital. What a glaring mismatch, I thought. She used to be a senior executive in an IT industry and had absolutely no related experience at all in the medical field.
I was too curious not to ask how she got into her hospital role. There were many steps that got her there but what really caught my attention was what she told the hiring board, “…I have a good heart”. Well, my instinctive reaction was, this seems to make a lot of sense as heart connections are just as important as a medical treatment for the well being of patients and staff alike.
At a superficial level, I saw a good heart as being kind; compassionate; helpful; humble; considerate; etc., well, all these seem to be not too difficult to do when the conditions are right. I thought I had a good heart too, till the real tests which set me thinking. It is when we have to deal with very difficult situations or when there will be problems; such as misunderstanding which causes doubts and even unhappiness, I could start to be judgemental; angry; impatient; etc..
What Is A Good Heart…
So what is causing these feelings ? Is there anything wrong with feeling this way, after all we are human with feelings… What is truly a good heart? I have been left pondering this for several weeks and do not think I have the complete answer yet to this deep question but it certainly set me thinking.
- How could my heart be good if I am being so judgemental… Yes, we perceive with our eyes and I have the weakness to see things on the surface and pass judgement. I made a terrible mistake recently in judging one’s behaviour to later learn that the person could be struggling with a mental health issue.
- How could my heart be good if I am not genuine… Yes, to be genuine, we must mean what we say through our actions and sometimes I do fall into the trap of doing good deeds out of my own ego. I recently was approached to help someone (whom I do not know) in need and I have to ask myself… if I did not know the person who approached me, would I still have readily extended the same help?
- How could my heart be good if I do not feel for another person’s hurt… Yes, we could have a misunderstanding that caused someone’s sadness and if I believed I was right, I would usually not take the first step to sort things out. I learnt many hard lessons in recent years and surely an area I must continue to work on to grow on… be humble.
- How could my heart be good if I feel a sense of envy or even jealousy… Yes, it is easy to wish others well but what if their success gives you a sense of envy ? I would be lying if I said I have never felt that way before. Well, such feelings could be caused by greed and discontentment, and deep down in our heart, do we still genuinely wish others well, irrespective of our own conditions?
Good Heart Matters…
If my starting point of having a good heart means bringing a sense of peace and happiness to those around me, unconditionally, what are the thoughts and actions I need to be consciously aware of to keep cultivating a good heart? Besides the ones above, my list goes on… And I pray that someday in this lifetime, I will be able to say with absolute confidence that my good heart is shining…
So look out for my future articles series on #goodheartmatters
Lyn 🌻😊
I love good hearts and enjoy your articles.
Thanks lyn for sharing!!
Thank you SL ❤️!
Thanks for sharing your heartfelt thoughts on this Lyn. Many of your points hit home and really got me to reflect my response to being ‘good’ and ‘kind’
Yes easy to lend a hand, express kind words when all is well, true test is when rubber meets the road.
My son was posted to a hospital as part of his vocation n the army… just yesterday he shared some experiences with handling patients… his observations lead him to conclude that one need compassion that come truly from the heart to front all the tough situations without judgement nor expecting to be thank for what you did or gave. I got a lot to learn… Happy Friday
Thanks Lina! It is a journey where all of us are at different level of good heart and we can never stop growing. Yes, hospital is a good ground to experience and develop our good heart… Great observations from your son and a wonderful reflection !
I think the fact that you are thinking about these things itself means you have a good heart! I am not sure if there will be a finality to it but is is a journey. Is my heart better today than it was yesterday? If the answer is yes, then we are on the right path and should not be too concerned about the pace of change. There are bound to be ups and downs along the path. In India we say “Lage Raho” – Just be at it. We will all reach there.
Thank you Sai, I really appreciate your thoughtful comments ! Well said with respect to focusing on daily growth and not be too distracted the pace of change! Each of us is at a different level and there is no one measured progress that is relevant for all.
Interesting post. For me, having a good heart means showing kindness in words and in deeds to those around us on a daily basis. Sounds simple but takes effort to practise constantly!
Thank you so much Suat! I can really resonate with your comments on “…in words and in deeds”..and for me, I am trying to practice my thoughts as well…
When i first applied to study in NUS many years back, my first choice was to major in social work. I had wanted to be a social worker after i graduate. Then , i thought i had the heart to serve. I didn’t end up in the course somehow, which is a blessing. I realised over the years i neither have the right temperament nor the right heart to qualify for the job. Now, i am still constantly trying very hard and conciously reminding myself to be a better person who is empathetic , kind, loving, patient and non judgemental . Yes, good heart matters, but it is so difficult to be one . I still make mistakes and regret it . Afterall, i tell myself, i am only a human being 🙂 🙂 🙂
Wow thank you so much for sharing your personal experience ❤️. This is so real and relatable, I am so glad you share with my readers here as there is so much we can learn from your journey. It is not just about our profession but about how we live our life. We really cannot quantify good heart and more important is to keep growing every single day, that’s what matters !
Thank you Lyn and Thank You to All your kind READERS who often share their responses with such caring attitude….
Yes #goodheartmatters….
I am motivated by your post and I am
Motivated to keep growing my good heart…. I believe our Shining Good Heart can help ease some pains of others, can help others feel better about lives….we need to help one another with Good Hearts. Thank You again and I look forward to growing with you with more Good Heart articles from you .
Thank you Leanne ! I am so encouraged by yours and all my other readers response. It keeps me motivated to keep writing good articles and also hopefully inspire others as well.. yes #goodheartmatters….
Extremely moving article and a moment of quiet introspection!
Looking forward to more on #goodheartmatters
I am so happy the article touches your heart and it keeps me motivated to keep writing more ❤️..
I believe there is good in everyone, just shown in different ways. I constantly remind myself to see the good, it hard at times in situations but worthwhile to calm our emotions down.
I learnt the most from children with the purest heart. Like my younger boy will bring extra story books to school and when I asked him : “J, why did you bring so many story books, your bag is so heavy!!” He will reply : “Mum, sometimes my friend forget to bring their story books,. Its for them.”
Thank you for sharing.
Yes, absolutely agree that the innate nature of human is good… and I really like your approach about calming down our emotions to see the good. Thank you, it motivates me to stay consistently with my mediation to calm my mind as I try to practice good heart ❤️.. And Well done Viv for bringing up such a giving boy, his kindness will go a long way to bring happiness both to himself and those around him !
Lyn, I enjoy reading this article. So inspiring, motivating and encouraging. So true, if u want to give light to others, u have to glow yourself. Thank u Lyn, May u be blessed more and best wishes.
Hi Eliza, thank you so much for your well wishes ! So happy you enjoyed the article and find it inspiring ! All the best wishes to you too ❤️.
Wow! A lot of self reflection & deepen thoughts, this is high level cultivation. Confucius’s disciple Zengzi said: “I examine myself three times every day. Have I been true to other people’s interests when acting on their behalf? Have I been sincere in my interactions with friends? Have I practiced what I have been taught?”
Wow Thomas, I like your Confucius examples, another great reminder for my practice. I am sure this will benefit my readers too. Thank you so much for sharing !